FINALLYYYYYY COME!!
I can't explain the joy to know we were putting the NICU at South Miami Hospital behind felt like after........98 Days and an estimated 2,352 hours for Gorda, 1,200 hours for mommy and 4 sleepovers on the chair, 4,900 Miles of Driving a whole lot of gas & tolls. 72,520 steps from parking to the NICU doors (You have no idea how many thoughts go through your head with each step you take day in & day out going to & from the NICU)
3 witnessed "Episodes" for mommy aka seeing my baby lifeless, 1 of which started in my arms
1 Surgery for "ROP" and 10 eye exams (Clips hold the babies eyes open it's a horrible thing to witness so much several nurses didn't even like being there for it)
200 Brady Cardia's
1,000 Desats
10 Blood Transfusions
16 Days on Ventilator
10 Days on Oscillator
7 Days on Cpap
Nasal Septum Breakdown
Reflux Diagnosis
Chronic Lung Disease Diagnosis
Partially Failed Hearing Test
20 "Stopped Feeds"
200 Needles/Pinches
35 Chest Xrays
10 Abdomen Xrays
4 Brain Sonograms
1 Heart Sonogram
24 Hours of "Drug Withdrawels"
Discharged with orders to:
Follow up with Specialist Ophthalmologist
Follow ups with Specialist Pulmonologist
Follow up with Specialist Occupational/Physical Therapy
Follow up with Specialist Audiologist
Follow up with Pediatrician
Discharged with continuing medications:
Lasix every 48 hours
Poly-vi-sol with Iron Twice a Day
Zantac Every 8 hours
Albuterol Every 12 hours
Flovent Puff Every 12 hours
Discharged with:
Oxygen 1/8 requirement 24-7
Apnea monitor 24-7
My baby's been through the ringer and maybe seeing an idea of it jotted down other's could understand the hole it leaves in a mother's heart!!! It wasn't always so easy to watch her go through it all, or to stay positive, it wasn't so easy to walk around with a smile, it wasn't so easy to celebrate holidays, it wasn't so easy to breath.....when you go through this with your first born or any child of yours you'll never be the same again...your heart is heavy for what your innocent baby had to suffer. You go through self blame & hours of wondering why me, why her, why us. It's one of those trials in life that you just ask everyday how will I get through, it breaks you down hour by hour and is extremely draining. It's a test of faith that you only find that day you put her in the car seat to go home, that's the moment you look back at it all & say how did I get through this.
Then your rushed with this sense of completion, I finally get to take my angel home where she belongs. No more longing to wake up to her smile, no more wishing she was laying with mommy & daddy in bed, no more saying goodnight & having to leave her there in the hospital, no more longing to hold her close, no more heart racing when the phone rings, or wondering when it was going to ring at 5am again, no more wondering if she was okay, no more wondering "Which nurse would be caring for her on the next shift", no more wondering if she was in her private room alone or is a nurse keeping her company, no more wondering does she wish mommy & daddy were next to her right now, no more wondering if she'd be home by the next holiday, no more wonders of the NICU World...now we move on to new Wonders!!!
I am a NICU MOM, I AM NICUSTRONG!!!!
HER LAST NIGHT SLEEPING IN THE NICU
OUR FIRST NIGHT SLEEPING TOGETHER AS A FAMILY "ROOMING IN"
GETTING READY TO FINALLY TAKE OUR ANGEL HOME
DADDY WAS ASKING HER IF SHE WAS READY TO GO HOME, SHE SMILED!!!
DR. PIERRE & DR. MORALES (LIKE ALL DOCS) WERE ALWAYS AMAZING WITH HER, WE BECAME FAMILY
SO MANY TIMES I SAW MOMS LEAVING WITH THEIR BABIES & LONGED FOR THE DAY IT'D BE US. I ALWAYS IMAGINED LEAVING WITH MY BABY IN MY ARMS ME SITTING IN THE WHEELCHAIR, WITH THE FLOWERS & BALLOONS. THIS LEAVE WAS A BIT DIFFERENT BUT STILL IT WAS A MOMENT OF PURE BLISS,
HEADING DOWNSTAIRS TO GO HOME!!
GORDA HAD A BIT OF A PANIC ATTACK LEAVING HOSPITAL, BUT WE MADE IT THROUGH & GOT HOME SAFE
THE PRINCESS IS HOME!!!
