Saturday, July 8, 2017

Sophia,

I know this life you've been given isn't easy for you baby! I'm so sorry for that, I wish I had the power to change this for you. I really do, you have no idea just how much I'd give to trade places with you. Today we spent the day getting your school supplies, as mommy doesn't like to wait until the last minute. It was a long & tiring day as all school shopping days are. A couple of days ago we did some clothes shopping for you, got those Disney "Cars" shoes you really wanted for school. You're growing so fast, it seems lately I have to get you clothes a lot more often! My tall, strong, kind, beautiful girl. Today I'm sad pondering what you said to me this evening. We were talking about school & you asked me why you can't "climb" up to the top of the playground in school. You mentioned how you don't want to stay at the bottom "alone". How the big kids all go to the top & "no one" wants to play with you at the bottom. Ay gorda, I wish baby that you could climb safely alone right now without losing your balance. I do wish you didn't have this condition that set limitations that set you so apart from your friends. I couldn't say nothing more to you in that moment but that I'm sorry you feel that way and remind you how Raquel at Bowman did play with you at the bottom. I pray you'll always have a "Raquel" kind of friend who won't leave you to feel so alone at school, so different, so incapable as you seem to feel at times. Just know my sweet girl that you're never "alone" so long as mommy is alive. I will never leave you at the bottom, we'll always be climbing to the top of this mountain set before you, TOGETHER! It might take us a little longer to get there, but we'll smile along the way & praise God that we have each other! You'll remind me with those sweet hugs & caresses of yours what truly matters in this life is not how hard the fight is, but the heart in the fighter! You my girl, well you have a heart of a Lion! I'm so proud of you, keep smiling baby girl! Te adoro!! I know baby one day I won't have to tell the teachers to sit you down for half of your recess, but right now baby that's where we stand today. I know one day you will be able to climb up trees, playgrounds, all of it alone, we'll keep praying & working hard in therapy for this all to come to fruit for you! BUT my girl please please never forget that if this day never comes, you still are one very very special girl! You still matter! You still are my AMAZING little butterfly! And you have climbed many mountains thus far, maybe not literally but you have, always be proud of how far you've come! Te amo con todo mi alma!!!

PS Remember "Progress, not perfection" (Although I must say you are quite perfect to me!)

Since you're so in love with Moana these days, so you never forget, I leave you here her reminder...."Come what may, I know the way!"..

And do you not look so adorable at 5 & 1/2 years old in this new orange (of course it's your favorite color) jump suit. Just how you love your clothes these days lol pants only & pockets pockets pockets. And walking out with your shoes, such a big girl! I love these pictures, I hope you'll enjoy looking back at this memory someday!