Graduation to Junior!!

As of today 11.20.11 gorda has graduated.....no more Oscillator (Freshmen)....no Ventilator (Sophomore)....she is officially back on the C-pap (Junior) they "extubated" her yesterday Saturday 11.19.11  @ 10.45a.m......God willing within a few days she will be on a Nasal Cannula (Senior).....for now the doctors want to keep her on the Cpap!  Mommy was with her all day yesterday just watching & hoping she would do well.....she is "Pulling" a lot to breath so the doctors are watching her to see how she continues to do.  Keep in mind there is always the possibility that if she doesn't do well she has to get "re-intubated" & go back on a "Ventilator" again but as of now my champ is hanging in there.....also hard for her now on Friday 11.18.11 my poor baby had all her "drugs" removed she was on a continous drip of basically a drug that sedates the baby a bit to deal with the pain of the oscillator and since that was discontinued as of Friday the baby has been having "Withdrawels" apparently some babies get a bit addicted to the drug and gorda did a bit and coping with the removal of it was tough for her especially the first 24 hours....so I slept over Friday night with her the only way she would stay calm was gripping both mommy's fingers.  Some symptoms of withdrawels are sneezing alot, pooping alot, twitching alot, high temperature, & a few other things....so that's why she wanted to grip my fingers if she didn't her hands were in the air constantly twitching....& her heart rate was super high....Daddy & I had basically been there with her from like 6pm-2am and she didn't sleep an ounce that night....we just left to go eat at 2am & when we came back around 2.30am I was going to go home but I couldn't so I told daddy to go home & I stayed...poor baby was like that all the way through until Saturday morning....I went to shower & rest a while to come back as quick as possible Saturday...by the time I got back they had already put her on the Cpap so that was the positive for the day but my gorda continued to have major withdrawels from the drug so much that they bundled her for the first time & they aren't even supposed to wrap them in blankets because they have to monitor their breathing...but it was the last resort to calm her down...finally the doctor said they were going to have to give her some morphine to help her with the withdrawels..so yesterday those were started & will continue for 72hours...to me of course I don't understand why if a child is having "withdrawels" from a drug they'd give another drug but apparently that is what they do it's their way of "weening them off the stronger drug"......So here we are that's the latest of my babies life...I hate to see her suffering it kills me..yesterday since she is on the Cpap now you can hear her crying & she was crying soooo much..it kills me that I can't just pick her up & carry her to comfort her!! A mother should never take for granted the "comforting" she can give her baby!!! I wish I could do more than stick my hand through a door and hold her little finger!! Missing my gorda dearly.....going to see her tonight!!
P.S.  Sophia's current weight is 2 lb 11 oz., and she is 13 1/4 inches long.